This is me, I can’t make apologies.

Everything here is a feeling, an emotion. I know that there are people going through the same things as my family, and there are those going through far worse. I know that some are handling it better than we are, and that we are handling it better than some. I have good thoughts and bad. My thoughts are uplifting and confident most days, but sometimes they are dark and crushing and I wonder if I can ever recover from them. I am happy, bubbly, full of life! I love to spend time with my extended family and talking and laughing together is our favorite thing to do. But sometimes I must be alone, I am scared and I wonder how anything will ever be right or good in our lives again. These feelings are not right or wrong, they are just there. Why? Three years ago, my daughter was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes just three months after turning 6 years old. She is scared of needles. Sometimes she has good days (i.e. glycemic control, health and happiness, cooperation) and sometimes she is raging with emotional and physical highs and lows. This blog isn’t about diabetes, it’s about living with diabetes. I’m not perfect, but having patience with my daughter when she is feeling her worst is one of my highest priorities as her single mom. Holding everything in doesn’t come without a price though. For two years I was slowly pushed to the edge of a serious emotional breakdown. When physical symptoms became obvious, my family and friends helped me to find the courage to ask my doctor for help. A year later, I am determined to stay strong and not let that happen again. I have found that I need someone to talk to. Someone who just listens. Not someone who gives advice, or tries to fix things, or knows the right thing to say at the right time. Definitely not someone who is smarter, more experienced, or who criticizes and corrects, or tells me how to feel. I already have them in my life. So, will you be that someone?

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